See you
by ElenDome
Summary: Grimmjow must endure a long ride back to his home town but unexpectedly the trip becomes much more interesting after meeting a certain Berry and his cat. AU, yaoi - By El


**I didn't plan to write a GrimmIchi story but I guess those two occupy too much space in my head and they felt a little cramped so... I took them for a ride. ;D**

**Thanks to Noxi who kept pushing me to not give up on finishing it (and for beta-proofing... again) :D**

**Warning: Yaoi! If you don't like don't read!**

**Disclaimer: Bleach belongs to Tite Kubo **

* * *

It was still dark outside and the only thing he could see through the window was the reflection of his own bright blue eyes staring back at him. _It's fucking too early to function!_

Though it had been only an hour since he boarded the train for Karakura town the deprivation of sleep had a devastating effect on his already short tempered nature. _Why did I let her convince me into this? Damn it Nel, you and your stupid_ _anniversary!_

Grimmjow hadn't seen his younger sister Nelliel for three years, he even missed her wedding and, playing his strings of guilt, she had forced a promise out of him that he will come and visit her and her husband on their one-year-anniversary. He hated going home; a certain event from his past caused the members of his family act wary around him, making him watch the hidden disappointment and condemnation, although everybody kept on convincing him there's nobody to blame and that maybe he should just find professional help; or simply forget. _A polite way of saying 'get a shrink'. Ha, alcohol is cheaper and it doesn't talk back. _He dragged his hand through the mess of blue locks, still feeling the consequences of last night's party softly banging behind his forehead. _Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to go clubbing yesterday... You're so paying for this Nnoi!_

He leaned against the cold window, closing his eyes; cold glass calmed down the throbbing pain, the dim light in the coupe and steady sound of the train-engine helping him drift into sleep.

* * *

_"Come on nii-chan! Just ten more minutes!" Nel's big hazel eyes were staring at him and begging, the lack of blinking making it impossible to refuse._

_"Fine. But just ten more minutes."_

_"Thanks, you're the best!" She threw her hands around his neck and rewarded him with a wide smile that emphasized the softness of her child-like features. _

_Unable to deny anything to his little sister, Grimmjow grunted: "You're too cute for your own good." In return he got another smile before she ran back to the slide where another two girls were waiting for her._

_Watching her play with her friends he sighed; Grimmjow had always been very protective towards his seven years old sister; the reason was mainly because their parents were away on business trips most of the time and he was pretty much raising Nelliel by himself - not an easy task for a 14-year old teen, especially for his inability to say 'no' to her puppy eyes, consequently giving her everything she wanted._

_All too soon, the fun had to be cut short: "Nel, your ten minutes are over." Actually it was more like fifteen but he didn't care about little details. They'll still have enough time to get ready for their dad's formal dinner-party they were hosting at their mansion._

_"Hai." She waved goodbye to her friends and reached for his hand. "I won, nii-chan. Lolly was hiding under the bush, but I still saw her feet!" She giggled, her cheeks still flushed from running._

_"That's great Nel, nobody messes with my genius sister." He pushed a runaway lock back behind her ear. "Now we better hurry or we'll be the ones hiding from dad if we're late."_

_Leaving the park they almost reached the crossroad, when the green light for pedestrians started blinking indicating it will turn red any second._

_"Hurry up nii-chan." With a smirky smile Nel let go of Grimmjow's hand and ran. "Let's see who's faster!" Her laughter echoed through the street and like a piercing chill of premonition lingered in the air._

_" Nel! Wait! Nel!" His cries faded in the silence of terror when everything slowed down as her fluttering hair and perfectly white dress were escaping his reach. "Nel, stop!" Suddenly, the world came crushing down... the screeching tires and a blunt sound pierced Grimmjow's very soul when a body rolled over the hood of the car. "NEL!" Consumed by fear he ran a short distance and, kneeling next to the unmoving body not daring to touch her, desperately called out her name: "Nelliel!" No answer came; her cyan locks were drenched in blood, the red pool slowly drifting toward Grimmjow's knees. "Nelliel! Wake up!" His own sight started to blur; heavy tears were falling down his cheeks, disappearing without a trace in the pool of red. "Wake up NEL! ... Please, wake up..."_

* * *

"Next stop: Nakaguri. Take caution while exiting and we wish you a nice day."

The voice over the speaker woke Grimmjow up; he looked around, lost for a moment because the images of the nightmare were still all too vivid. _Damn, I'm never drinking again! Fucking booze!_ He didn't drink enough to send him into oblivion but apparently just enough to awaken the buried memories, those memories he so desperately tried to leave behind but were coming back again and again as a painful reminder of his inability to escape himself.

The darkness outside was pierced by the lights of an approaching train station. It was a small station, more like a shack with just three wooden walls and an old bench; behind it Grimmjow could see the shadowy outline of a small village, not larger than thirty houses.

_Who the hell lives in this godforsaken place? It's not even worth stopping; would the train not stop at every piss-hole it wouldn't need six hours to drive 300 km*. I mean, six-fucking-hours! Anybody forgot to tell them we live in the 21th century?!_

From the corner of his eyes he caught a glimpse of something orange before the train started moving again. A quick glance at the cellphone told him he still had to endure more than four hours of uncomfortable ride.

Not being able to sleep anymore he leisurely stretched his legs, placing his feet on the opposite seat and opened a game application on his phone. But, just as he had pressed 'start game' the door of the coupe slid open and an orange haired guy with a sportsbag in one hand and a pet-cage in the other looked inside, frowning disapprovingly as his glance traveled from Grimmjow's feet resting on the seat up to his blue eyes.

"Sorry, but you think your feet could give up a seat?"

_Great just what I need, a stuck-up ass._"Are you pathologically annoying or just plain stupid? You have a whole wagon to choose from where to park your ass." _Or in idiot-language: go the hell away!_

Newcomer, unfazed by Grimmjow's rude answer, entered closing the door behind him. "There are all reserved, genius, except for this and the next one. But there is some old lady in there and it smells funny." He put the cage on the floor in the middle of the passage and pushed Grimmjow's legs aside making enough room to sit down.

Grimmjow laughed: "The smell of old people – I should get that deodorant; it apparently works great as a repellent. Besides, this is not the only wagon."

"Don't bother, I'm not buying first-class ticket just so you can have your own little private space. They call it _public_ transportation for a reason. But if _you_ have such desire... be my guest."

_Guess I'm not the only one with an insomnia problem. _"The last time I checked the reserved coupes were still empty except if there are ghosts occupying them."

Eyes of the color of chocolate ice-cream - and just as cold - pierced Grimmjow's. "You don't take the train often, do you? If you're in a mood for some bitching from the conductor about being illiterate please, pack your big mouth and take a hike. Although it is funny to hear that from someone who didn't have the balls to sit in the _ghost _area."

"First come first served." A smirk spread over Grimmjow's face. _Smartass, ha... Maybe this won't be so boring after all._

Grimmjow returned to his game but couldn't quite focus because most of his attention was still on his companion and his unnatural orange hair that was cut short and almost as messy as Grimmjow's; dark blue jeans and snow-white shirt were a perfect combination for his lean-built body. _Not half bad. Simple but effective; shows just enough to leave plenty to imagination. I always love discovering if my guess was right. _

Unexpected _meow_ averted Grimmjow's attention towards a pet-cage on the floor. "_What_ have you got there?"

Completely ignoring him the orange-head opened the cage door and took out a white ball of fur. It took a couple of seconds for Grimmjow to realize that those bright blue eyes peeking at him belonged to a kitten.

He raised one eyebrow: "You don't strike me as a cat person; more in the line of a fuzzy rabbit with a heavy addiction to carrots."

"Nice try, but I've heard a million and one joke at the expense of my haircolor and that one wasn't even as original as you think."

_Shoot and burn._ "Not my best day." Grimmjow leaned forward and cuddled the cat under its chin. "Cute little thing."

"Yeah, and expensive too. I had to go to some behind-god's-ass village to find it; I'm pretty sure they still burn witches there." Seeing that Grimmjow's expression was clearly telling him he's an idiot, he explained a little more. "It's a rare breed in this parts, Blue-eyed white persian, and before you ask, it's a gift."

_For who, Queen of England? _The sound of sliding door interrupted him, stopping him effectively from commenting out loud. _Conductors really know how to pick a moment._

"Hold her." Orange-boy pushed the cat towards Grimmjow so he could find a ticket. Blue eyes caught a glimpse of a pink card, signed _'Forever yours, Berry'_.

_White cat and a pink gift card - how much more of a living cliche can you get?_

Mesmerized by the cat's thick and smooth fur Grimmjow found himself enjoying the touch of soothing warmth and the hypnotic look of dazzling blue eyes that were almost a match to his. It was all too soon that he had to return the hairy ball back.

"Thanks." While reaching for a purring beauty orange locks softly brushed against Grimmjow's chin; a faint smell of shampoo mixed with cologne made him want to bury his hands into them. "Seems like she's fond of you. Strange, wouldn't take you for a cuddly type."

_Is this supposed to be a payback for 'the rabbit' remark? Have to disappoint you, you're a bit late for teaching ME how to be a wisenheimer. _"Let me help you with the punchline, wise guy: 'You've just been smartassed'."

"Funny. Ha, ha." Berry was struggling to put the unwilling cat back into the cage and managed to knock over his unzipped bag. Letting go of the kitty, who used the opportunity to hide between Grimmjow's legs, he hurriedly began to stuff everything back - but it was too late. Grimmjow had already recognized one of the object that fell out - the bottle of clear and colorless liquid - and it brought his typical evil grin to his lips.

He waited until everything, including the cat, was in its proper place before poking into what he knew would be a sensitive topic. "Adorable beast, your partner must be someone special to be worth of going through all this trouble."

The answer was as blunt as the annoying music on the radio that was playing for the entertainment of the passengers: "She is."

Grimmjow, a little taken aback, carefully examined his seatbuddy's face and when there was no indication of a joke or pretentiousness he started laughing. _And I naively thought mentioning his 'male' partner would be enough to embarrass him._

What he got in return was a premium _What-the-Fuck_-face. "Glad you find... something amusing. Although... I would have a personal request of my own; nothing too hard, but if you manage... _please_... at least _act_ as a sane person."

"This is better then _any_ reality show! Hell, they should name a drug after you." After many more minutes passed he finally calmed down enough to talk. "Seriously, _she_? Oh honey, _she_'s in for a big surprise when you finally find the closet-doors."

"Wha..."

"Don't even bother denying; with clean ironed clothes you could get away but who in their right mind would shave at 1 am. Plus - freshly washed hair; was that a conditioner I smelled before... peach, right? And let me not start with the cat."

"What's wrong with the cat?" Berry was still completely oblivious to Grimmjow's implications.

"Oh come on! Blue-eyed white persian? Most men hardly distinguish between a dog and a rat. And you even sacrificed, I assume, a whole night just to come pick it up – sending someone else or even a delivery is much more popular these days." Grimmjow left the meaningful silence do its job and was slightly anxious in anticipation of an answer.

Slowly, a sign of recognition started to shine through. "What?! Are you serious? NO! I'M NOT GAY!"

_You sure are not one of the smartest one out there._

"No! I'm married to a beautiful woman; we live together, we're happy and..." With a wide, almost evil smirk Grimmjow listened to Berry's efforts to make a good argument against his perfect logic. "...and ... and what's wrong if I refuse to smell like an old sweaty punching bag?"

"Nothing at all. I like men taking care of their hygiene." The words may had sounded comforting but his face had_ 'devilish pleasure'_ plastered all over. _First step: Denial._

"And I love my wife! That's why I got her this damn cat. She mentioned she loves their eyes..."

"How many times?"

"Excuse me?" Unexpected question stopped Berry's ranting.

Grimmjow repeated the question, this time slower as if talking to a mentally challenged person: "How. Many. Times. Did. She. Mention. The cat?"

"Does it matter?" Berry was getting angrier by the minute. "It was twice, okay? But every thoughtful husband would remember it. That doesn't prove anything!"

"My bad. You're a wonderful thoughtful caring husband who is also her best friend." Grimmjow's voice was dripping sarcasm. "The only thing that's missing is combined shopping." A faint blush told him more than any words. "Holy shit! And you need more proof?"

The level of Berry's irritation was rising fast. "Screw you! You have no right judging me and my life! You know nothing about me! Yes, I'm caring and... all that... but it's stereotypical to think that makes me gay!"

Grimmjow sighed. "Really didn't wanna embarrass you however it's your own fault." Leaning forward he reached into Berry's bag and pulled out the bottle with a red lip mark and a sign _'stick with us and be free'_. "I suppose you're just holding it for a friend."

Even master ninja couldn't move as fast as the _I'm-not-gay_ had ripped the tube out of Grimmjow's grasp and shoved it deep into the bag. "Fuck off! I don't have to explain myself to you, you... you..."

"Let me help you there, the word you're looking for is _an_ _angel of revelation_ or maybe _the bringer of light_ or - my personal favorite - _blue-haired devil_." Leisurely sitting back and letting one hand support his head Grimmjow observed the gawking face. _Alluring eyes – the color of a chocolate ice cream, now without the coldness... they just scream uke._

After a couple of attempts to speak Berry gave up, packed his baggage and pushed open the door, took another look at Grimmjow. "Rot in hell!" Then he slammed the door closed behind him.

_Second step: anger._

* * *

For the next half an hour Grimmjow was entertaining himself with eavesdropping on an old lady's gibberish coming from the next coupe explaining to his ex-seatbuddy about her life story.

"It's so lovely that young men today are so considerate to their spouses. My husband just picks a rose from _my_ garden _after_ I tell him it's a special day. He always has excuses like 'men aren't programmed to remember such silly things'. But you know what; I got tired of such attitude and so you never guess what I did last year; on the day of our 56th wedding anniversary I yanked out all the flowers in the garden and can you imagine what he did?! He gave me a coupon for 10% off in a car-wash! A coupon!"

_And that's how real men do it; they're insensitive bastards but women love them nonetheless. Hm, that logic makes Stark a bitch. _He remembered his not so distant past when Stark almost got PMS after Grimmjow decided that the best birthday present for him would be some chick-flick about vampires and werewolves arguing over some annoying teenage girl. _He was so insulted by my underestimation of his intelligence that we hadn't spoken for a week. But he had no objections going out last night; probably to lazy to hold a grudge._

Just after Grimmjow realized there were no more voices coming from the coupe next door, the sliding door opened revealing a very miserable looking Berry.

_They always come for more. _"Forgot something?"

"Yeah, my dignity." Brown-eyes assessed the possibility of occupying the same seat as before. "I rather listen to your delusions than her life stories."

_You just keep telling yourself that. _Grimmjow smiled widely. "I had a hunch she's not your type."

"Oh, shut it." He put the cage down a little harder then necessary causing the cat to meow and began staring into his own window reflection. Silence lasted only a minute. "I always dated women." Without averting his gaze from the glass he looked like a lost puppy asking for forgiveness after wetting the couch. "And I liked them..."

"If you're gonna continue with a 'but' there is nothing more to say, hot cakes."

"Tch, what do you know! I like having..." After a confident start Berry's voice turned into a whisper. "...having... sex with my wife." Tightly holding the sportsbag with that traitorous bottle of lube, his gaze didn't reach above Grimmjow's knees. "This... It's for her pleasure... it's easier..." His avoiding gaze was on the verge of begging.

_He actually expects comfort from me; 'me' who just pushed him out of his little comfort zone. _It took a lot of willpower for a bluenet not to laugh out loud at the bizarre situation. _He's just too cute. Fine, I'll give you a bone._

"Have you ever considered that you don't fell in love with a gender but a person? I have no doubts you love your wife, you just don't love fucking her. But hey, every marriage has its problems."

Anger, resentment, even a punch would be a normal reaction in Grimmjow's book; instead what he got was guilt.

"I like it, it's just... it's not... that." Berry's face was flushed almost to the point it matched his hair; to hide the embarrassment he buried his redness in his palms. "I can't believe I'm talking about my sex-life with a complete stranger. ... But I can't hurt her... not now."

_Wow, you skipped a step there – where's the bargaining stage?_

"She's so vulnerable and..."

"Yeah, yeah; you love her." Grimmjow rolled his eyes. "You said it so many times I'm starting to wonder who are you trying to convince. Oh, I see! That's why you're such a perfect husband – to lessen your guilt. She must be pretty stupid or simply naive to not notice..." A hard slap cut his words short.

"You will _not_ talk that way about my wife! She's a beautiful compassionate woman with more balls you'll ever have!" Berry was now standing looking down on bluenet with flames of anger flickering in his eyes. "Apologize, right now!"

_Who would've thought; little rabbit has some spunk. And right when I thought the fun is over. _"She definitely has more balls than you; you even hit like a girl." Without warning he reached out and grabbed Berry's crotch making him gasp loudly. He used his other hand to pull Berry's lips closer to his own giving him a soft kiss. "Well, well looks like there is something in your pants after all."

Before there could be any reaction the train started breaking slow, making the stumped Berry lose his balance and fall into Grimmjow's lap, the latter not wasting the opportunity to mess with him some more by putting his arms around the slender waist and whispering in his ear: "If I knew that's all it takes to shut you up I wouldn't bother losing so much words."

Loud voices of chattering children who had just boarded the train drowned any answer. Faster than was humanly possible Berry jumped from Grimmjow's lap to his own seat and pretended nothing had happened while newly arrived passengers passed by their coupe.

"Excuse me, is this seat taken?" Four girls were squeezing in the doorway admiringly glancing from blue to orange and batting their eyelashes in a attempt of bad flirtation.

"Girls!" A strict looking woman, apparently a teacher, appeared. "We have five reserved coupes, there's no need to bother other passengers." Turning to Grimmjow she adjusted her glasses before apologizing. "Sorry for the intrusion." And pushed her students to move down the corridor. "Let's go girls."

"Yes, Ise-sensei." Their giggles and chatter soon joined the laughter of their schoolmates.

_Of all days they could have a school trip by train... it has to be the day I'm on it. However... _Grimmjow devoted all his attention to the still flushed new toy who has been refusing to look anywhere else then the corner of a windowsill. _I wonder... did I look that lost, innocent and vulnerable too...? Right, and pigs can fly. _As if his own brains would want to support that theory a flashback of his first time came to mind.

He was a junior in high school and the first time he laid his eyes on the raven-haired four-eyed genius he knew exactly how he wanted to bend him over. New year's party was a perfect opportunity to satisfy that desire. _Couple of shots and the stuck up pencil soon transformed into a purring kitty. Too bad there's no bar here; alcohol opens a lot of doors. _Side smile revealed one unnaturally sharp canine. _Well, I haven't had a challenge for some time and there's still almost three hours to kill._

With a new resolve he got up and closed heavy curtains on the entrance into the coupe. _Sorry, your cool-act can't hide those glowing cheeks. Don't worry I'll give you something to blush for. _Instead of sitting on his previous spot Grimmjow took the seat next to I-still-ignore-you co-traveller, leisurely leaning back and checking his phone.

"I understand you must be confused right now and it's pointless to argue so let's just do it and get rid off all doubts. I have time."

The shock of hearing his words made Berry turn meeting the azure eyes only a feet away. "Are you retarded?! Here?!"

Malicious smirk glowed on blue-haired devil's face. _So, you're not worried about doing it rather about the place. Progress. _"Why not; we have this space for ourselves and at this hour there'll be no new passengers." _Probably. _Sliding closer to his ear Grimmjow whispered. "Thanks to those noisy brats you can even be as loud as you like, nobody will hear you, except me."

Grimmjow was pushed back although the shove didn't have the right determination in it; like a scared child who doesn't dare to say _'yes'_. That was all bluenet needed; he covered Berry's hand, which was resting on his chest still trying to keep him away, and put zero distance between their lips.

Soft but firm touch surprised Berry and he tried to move back but he hit the window glass.

"Running? Am I such a bad kisser?"

"I don't think th..." Any further rumbling was cut off by a new invasion of Grimmjow's lips. This time he didn't give him the time to move away. Sliding his tongue across still pressed together lips and a slight encouraging push was enough for Berry to invite him in. Grimmjow pressed his body closer, enjoying the shy playfulness mixed with the fresh-menthol toothpaste that couldn't hide the bland taste of cigarette smoke.

"No, stop!" This time the shove was stronger.

Grimmjow backed down for a change. "Feeling guilty already? Stop being so anxious; I won't tell." He couldn't wipe off the nefarious half-smile even if he wanted to. "Or you just can't keep another secret from your precious wife. She doesn't know you smoke, does she."

Confusion as if being perplexed with which problem he should address first, wide open eyes stared at Grimmjow: "Wha.. I don't smoke!"

"Hm, maybe I was wrong. Let me check again."

Despite Berry's declining attitude he moved his head slightly sideways and closed his eyes. _He looks so vulnerable... so lost..._ Trying not to scare him Grimmjow glided his tongue lightly across Berry's lower lip before gently moving inside. Shy but determined response wasn't as surprising as the sensation of the body next to himself relaxing more and more with every passing second. _For a virgin you're very cooperative. _Grimmjow wasn't completely ready to admit that Berry's racing heart under his fingers draw him nearer. _I miss this. Closeness. To give in to someone, to be more than just sex... I envy you..._

What felt like minutes where in fact seconds; they parted, leaving Berry squashed between the window and Grimmjow's body.

"Well... Did I smoke?" Rapid heartbeat and shaking voice did not match the question.

_Seriously? So that's how awkward and nervous look mixed together. _He wasn't able to hold it down anymore – laughter echoed through the coupe and the corridor and even kids' chattering stopped.

"What? What's so funny? WHAT?!"

"Give me just a minute... ha ha ha..." Grimmjow needed more than a minute to calm down and face now sulking Berry. "I know tons of smartasses but you're my first comedian. Oh, don't pout, it's not your fault beauty can't buy brains."

"You're a real pig, you know that."

"Know what, to make it up to you, I'll show you the best cigarette sensation ever." Grimmjow closed in again and nibbled on the ear hidden under the orange locks. "The after sex-smoke."

Warm breath tingled down the line of Berry's neck when at the same time a gentle hand glided over his shoulders to his back where it tightened the grip pulling Berry closer. Bright blue eyes watched intensely the changes on his face; from denying pleasure to silent longing for not stopping._ Ignorance is a bliss... You're the unlucky one to have me as you first; well, now you'll know another kind of bliss._

Skillful fingers traveled upward over the dark jeans; unfamiliar movement awoke Berry's doubts as he was trying to conceal the rising bulge between his legs but Grimmjow simmered down his fears with a tender kiss in the corner of Berry's mouth while nudging his grappling hand out of the way.

_Mmm, gives a 'full pants' a whole new meaning._

Stroking slowly he took pleasure in eyeing the flushed cheeks and temptingly parted lips. _Fourth step: Acceptance. _Moving further up and taking in every detail under the white shirt, his hands didn't stop until his fingers reached the nipples. _Thank god you're not wearing a wife beater. _A small chuckle escaped him after hearing silent meow. _Though you've been beaten by wife. _A gentle squeeze on a sensitive nipple distracted Berry from the bluenette's slip. _But, as for the next three hours... you belong to me._

* * *

_How could this be? I... I... No, don't touch...shit... _Berry grinded his teeth together to hold in the moan which was trying to escape ever since the blue-haired demon violated his mouth. Strong hands held him pressed tight against the muscled body.

_This can't be happening... I'm... not... enjoying... Did he just giggle?!" _An electrical shock of pleasure made him completely forget about everything... almost everything. _This is wrong; it's cheating... _He bit his own hand when Grimmjow returned to rub the already too tight part of the pants and let him slide his tongue along the neck, going lower and lower...

_Shit... she never touched me like that. She... No! It's wrong! Stop! _But his body no longer belonged to him; not knowing when and how, his fingers ended up entangled in the blue locks unwilling to let go.

_Is that all it takes to lose my control, to throw away all principles, to... oh, god!. _A warm touch of bare skin on his abdomen sent chills through his body. _This can't be real. What am I doing?_

"Averting your eyes won't change the reality." Sapphire blue eyes were only a breath away piercing through his essence itself. "Your body knows the truth that your mind tries to deny."

It was hard to focus under Grimmjow's consuming gaze; Berry opened his mouth and realized his throat was completely dry. '_Can't..'. Say it! 'Can't do this.' Say it! _

The hand stilled and was currently resting on his chest under the shirt burning through his skin; it did nothing but lie frozen in the moment, however Berry felt the weight of Grimmjow's body leaning over him. _When did you get so close?_ He felt Grimm's breath on his face, a single lock of blue hair fell down brushing against his cheek teasing him to dare move. Subconsciously he reached for the hair and brushed it away; the silky touch was too much - he needed more, no, he wanted more. Following his own impulses he buried his fingers in the azure mess and a beam of pride overwhelmed him when a glimpse of surprise shined in the deep blue after Berry took Grimmjow's breath for his own.

Before realizing, his eyes were shut, he was devouring the intoxication of his first true kiss; no past, no future, no doubts... only _now_ mattered...

Letting one hand fall down Grimmjow's cheek, past the shoulder, it followed the shape of the muscular arm till it reached the palm resting beside his hips supporting Grimmjow's leaning posture. Breaking apart Grimmjow shifted his weight, entangled his fingers with Berry's and drew them to his lips to leave a wet kiss on Berry's index finger; a simple romantic gesture he would have never expected from a pugnacious narcissist.

The whisper was hardly louder than a sound of the train engine: "You are a real tease." An unexpected tug pulled Berry out of his seat and in one swift movement they landed on the opposite seat, Berry positioned with his legs across Grimmjow's lap.

Without letting go of his hand and with no time left to think Grimmjow's free hand slid across Berry's back, past the waist and slipped under the edge of his jeans. _Oh shit! What are you doing to me... no, what I let you do... _Berry wrapped his arms around Grimmjow's neck, hiding his embarrassment in Grimmjow's shoulder to stow away the turned-on face.

"Don't." Firm yet tender touch running through his hair made him look up straight into the enchanting ocean depths of lust and... _Is that care?_ "Don't hide. This is who you are."

_Am I? _The sensation from the kiss a minute ago was still lingering on his lips._ Why do you know me better then I know myself?_ Comforting kisses tracing across his chin were enough to banish such thoughts away, leaving only longing to drown in the devil's embrace.

* * *

Grimmjow's skin was shivering when his lips were traveling past Berry's, brushing them as a tease and continuing their path down to the exposed collarbone. He burned with desire to rip Berry's shirt off but something held him back; Berry's uneasy response, the melting of his old beliefs and newly found avidity mixed in his every touch had awakened feelings long forgotten; feelings of letting go and losing oneself even if just for a moment, to escape reality.

Warmth filled his body, wanting to hold, to protect, to never let go. But Berry didn't allow him to hide that easily; his, a second ago still tight embrace, had loosened as though Grimmjow's words had given him some comfort but his hands stayed clutched behind his neck still looking for support; something he wasn't able to give. _I'm sorry... I can't protect you... I can't protect anyone... I'm not... strong enough... _Cyan hair drenched in red took over his mind, leaving him motionless.

"You all right?" Eyes burnished by passion and mixed with sincere compassion were scanning his face; Grimmjow saw his own reflection in the untarnished gaze, staring back at him with uncharacteristically bitter look.

Nervous laugh started to gather in the back of Grimmjow's mind; to hold it in he hid behind his palm. _Unbelievable, you are able to pity 'me', a stranger who possibly ruined your perfect little life. Why can't you be a simple slut, a bastard, anything except... nice... I'm not good with nice..._

A touch, light as a brush of a butterfly wing, moved his hand of the face leaving his feelings exposed under Berry's gaze. "Don't. If you turn back now you're nothing but a coward and you don't strike me as that kind of a man... or am I wrong, _blue-haired devil_?" His lips moved closer leaving wet imprint on one of Grimmjow's closed eyelids and moved on to search for the warmth of his breath.

_A coward? Yes I am, but not today. _Consumed by greedy tongue-play his mind was made: leave everything in darkness, only lust mattered, only Berry's shivering body pressing hard against his, willing to let him do whatever he wants with it.

Still entwined in the kiss Grimmjow's skillful fingers found the other male's shirt buttons and began to unfasten them, leaving Berry's chest fully exposed to exploration; his nipples were already hard and it didn't take much to leave Berry gasping in pleasure, arching his back and from the sight of it, leaving Grimmjow breathless when their erections brushed against each other.

Clutching his teeth to swallow the moan his hands intuitively grabbed hold of Berry's waist to stop him from doing any more fortuitous movement. _For someone who is in denial you're doing a heck of a job; but I'm not letting you go off that easy. _

Not letting Berry's pleasure subdue he moved down, unbuttoning Berry's pants while still holding him firmly in his embrace. He locked his gaze at Berry's lustful expression when his hand started stroking him, slow and steady.

"Oh God!" Eyes shut, fingers clutched in Grimmjow's shoulders, his head thrown backwards - Berry wasn't able to hold back anymore; heavy breathing and loud moans were like poetry to Grimmjow's ears, as he was barely holding himself back from the feverish body luring him to devour and ravish. _Not yet._

Lifting Berry up on his knees, he swapped their positions and lowered himself a little, taking in a full view of Berry's exposure and, wasting no time, he wrapped his mouth around Berry's erection. _You had the chance to bail; now I'll make you never to forget me._

* * *

When Grimmjow took him in his mouth, a burning mix of confusion, heat, shame, lust and unmistakable enjoyment overwhelmed him. _Oh God! _All of his senses were heightened - the rough fabric of a washed-out seat rubbing against his back, the sound of the train engine rumbling beneath his feet, relaxing chatter of the other passengers on the other side of the closed curtains but nothing could compare to the attention-seeking touches of his lover which were the only thing holding him back from giving in to the cloud of insanity, screaming to start thrusting and reach fastly approaching peak.

_Don't stop! Don't stop! _The words echoed in his mind until they finally slipped out. "Don't stop!" Bluenet obliged and even took it to another level by pushing the free hand under Berry's tight pants and sought his back-entrance. Incommodious sensation lasted only for a brief moment and Berry found himself muffling his groans awakened by massaging fingers and a skillful mouth.

Only a step away from falling over the edge into the blissful nothingness, everything stopped; only a still lingering sensation of Grimmjow's burning skin touching his remained.

"Aren't you one selfish little rabbit?" Fiery azure-eyes never left Berry's when he stood up revealing a bulge heavily pressed against the fabric of his jeans.

_Shit! Was I supposed to... _insecurity and doubts returned but were quickly flushed away by a new wave of passion that arose while observing Grimmjow trying to undo his belt. "Let me." He ignored Grimmjow's surprised expression that soon turned into a smirk after the orange-head managed to free his pulsating cock; without thinking he wrapped him in the warmth of his mouth, the remaining fears melted away with Grimmjow's gasping sound of excitement that was slowly making Berry go insane.

Strong hands were firmly embedded in his locks, dictating the rhythm of his movement; clasp was getting more and more aggressive, hips thrusting into his mouth – he felt him in the back of his throat provoking the gag reflex but refused to falter now – Grimmjow's rapacious appetite only increased his own arousal. _Who's the selfish one now?_

"Berry." Hardly a whisper, the name slipped out and lingered in the air drilling its way into Berry's brain. _Berry. Berry. His wife was the only one who called him that. Berry... _With a different kind of determination he pushed the thought away. _She'll never know... _

Sudden pull by his hair freed his mouth and before knowing his mouth was violated again, this time by Grimmjow's tongue. _He doesn't know, no, he doesn't care. _Pressing harder against Grimmjow's chiseled body covered in the thin layer of sweat the kiss deepened._ It's too late anyway..._

* * *

_Who would've thought Berry has such an amazing mouth?_ Berry's tongue almost made the bluenet come like a thunderbolt; grinding his teeth he managed to hold back but wasn't able to resist the engulfing heat; silky hair strands were trying to escape his grip while he violated Berry's mouth, again and again.

In the rush of passion he wanted more; he wanted those chocolate eyes to melt but Berry devoted solely to his job at hand kept his eyes shut. _Look at me. Look, god dammit!_ Unable to catch enough breath he only managed to utter one word. "Berry."

This simple word, meaningless and _probably not even his true name_ triggered a sequence of flashes all showing him images of Berry; from his first virginlike blushing cheeks, angry flickering gaze, playful tongue to the tenderness of his touch; Grimmjow wished for this moment never to end; he longed for being drowned in the embrace of pure lust.

With all the willpower could muster he yanked Berry's hair pulling him up and savor Berry's mouth while letting his hand find its way down. Their lips still united, tongues dancing, Berry inhaled sharply at the touch of the groping hand, almost swallowing Grimmjow's tongue.

Not stopping the stroking movement Grimmjow's tongue slid along the cheekbone toward an ear. "Easy, I may still need it." _Talking about need... _"Think you could spare some of that lube of yours?" Reaction was far from a drunk man sobering, meaning the one Grimmjow predicted; instead the flaming look told him more then any words could - Berry no longer had a wife or a quiet suburban life, all he had was this moment... with him. _Trading your future for an instant of bliss; I really am the devil... _But he didn't have it in him to feel too bad about it.

Stepping backwards he backslided into the seat dragging Berry with him. While searching for the bottle in the bag next to him, Berry's hands found their way under the black T-shirt lifting it just enough to expose the nipples; clumsy nibbling revealed his inexperience but it was the effort that turned Grimmjow on. _A virgin making me go crazy... I wonder how long I could hold back... _The rubbing of their erections against eachother really wasn't working in his favor.

Berry's hands were still exploring his abs and Grimmjow used that moment to push his lubed fingers below Berry's waist looking for a specific spot. _Damn, this pants of yours are to tight. _Problem was quickly solved by grabbing Berry's waist and pulling him up so that Berry was now arching above him, knees resting on the seat beside Grimmjow's thighs. With more affinity then he admitted he let the weight of his hand push Berry's pants out of the way leaving him to freely explore Berry's behind.

"Relax." Gently fondling his back entrance slightly changing the pressure made Berry loosen up. Grimmjow didn't brake the eye contact not even for a second... _I wanna see it all; all of you. Show me. _Carefully he pushed one finger in, absorbing the mix of bewilderment and distress only with his gaze. After giving him enough time to adjust to the intrusion he let another finger slide in, in search of that special spot to eradicate that perplexing expression. _Just a little more... Damn... Where... _

Suddenly Berry's face glowed. "Holy fucking shit!"

_There it is._

* * *

It was a new sensation, stronger then anything he experienced before; he felt Grimmjow's fingers moving inside making him shiver in ecstasy. _This can't be, what's he doing... _Finally used to the steady rhythm of Grimmjow's fingers he relaxed and tried to move; pleasure exploded in his head, efficiently eradicating all restrains and allowing a long suppressed moan to pass his lips.

"Shit Berry, I can't hold back anymore." Grimmjow's eyes, still clear blue not so long ago, were hooded with a dark shadow of restrain.

Realization struck Berry; only now had he seen the true Grimmjow hidden behind the solid barrier of smartassing, vulnerable and alone never to show his weaknesses, always wary, and not completely sure either it was Grimmjow's fingers or his eyes that moved his heart but after all it didn't really mattered. _You exposed my very soul, took it for your own and still treated it like delicate piece of art, careful not to brake it, demanding nothing in return._

Gently as if Grimmjow's face was made of the finest porcelain Berry cupped the bluenet's face and leaned down, leaving a soft reassuring kiss on his lower lip fully aware of what follows. "I want all of you."

* * *

Grimmjow never imagined himself to fall for corny moves, but with Berry... ..._is this really the same person? _

He could feel Berry's hands that were holding him tremble ..._in fear? Expectation? No... devotion. _Berry's innocence and blind trust reached – completely unnoticed - a part of Grimmjow he himself kept hidden for so long._ When the hell did you cross my wall? _To hide the gentleness he was sure was visible in his eyes, he embraced Berry's lean body and nibbled on his shoulder. He wanted to utter the infamous _'Are you sure?' _but was afraid Berry may change his mind.

Reassuring arms that were wrapped around him were like a cocoon of refuge and Berry's words came like an answer to an unspoken question. "It's my choice."

The sound of numerous feet passing their coupe covered the thump of a falling bag when Grimmjow pushed it out of the way to make room for Berry. Pressing him against the seat, Grimmjow's trail of distracting kisses across his abdomen, avoiding the pulsating erection, reached the half-undressed jeans and slowly pushed them over the knees and off together with grey sneakers Berry wore, leaving him on the mercy of Grimmjow's devouring gaze. A flush of no longer shame but pure lust, coloring Berry's skin was irresistible. "You are making me go crazy."

Berry just smiled pulling him closer to play with his earlobe and let Grimmjow lift him up, instinctively wrapping his own legs around the bluenet's thighs. In that instant they were both thrown backwards because of the train's breaking; Berry once more landed in Grimmjow's lap.

Not caring for the noisy shoving around in the corridor their hands were all over eachother until the familiar sliding sound interrupted them; Berry froze but Grimmjow turned towards the curtains completely unfazed: "I have a gun and I'm not afraid to use it!" Whoever it was had decided not to risk it and soon the only sounds left were the roaring of the engine and Berry's heavy breathing.

"That was close." Berry's raising heartbeat was thumping against Grimmjow's chest. "Didn't you say there'll be no passengers at this hour... and seriously, _a gun?_"

"All depends on the perspective." _If that wasn't a lame thing to say... _His fingers quickly found that magic spot again - just as a tease before he grabbed Berry's asscheeks and lifted him, rubbing his erection against Berry's entrance; it made him skip a breath.

No words were needed, Berry's hand led him to the entrance; it was Grimmjow's turn to gasp. _Holy... you learn fast. _

Carefully studying every tiny expression on Berry's face he lowered him down; teeth clutched in what Grimmjow knew was pain. _First time is the hardest. _Simple and yet soothing touch of Grimmjow's lips on Berry's chest helped him adjust to the feeling before Grimmjow continued, slowly; all Berry's body weight rested on his hands, giving him complete control.

Only one thought occupied Grimmjow's mind - ..._It's his first time_... - and he wanted to give him a memorable experience; or more precisely, _he_ wanted to be remembered. With great care he lowered Berry some more, taking away the discomfort with soft kisses. _God, you're tight. _

When he was all in, his hands now free of Berry's weight, he slowly started stroking Berry's erection pressed against his abdomen and brought his lips closer again.

They stayed locked in the embrace until Grimmjow felt Berry relaxing a bit; then he braced his asscheeks again and started moving in a slow steady rhythm, the pain of scratching nails on his back amplifying the excitement, forcing him to thrust deeper and deeper.

Berry soon got used to Grimmjow's movement and he used his hands to slide across blue-eyed savage's chest, leaving thin scratch marks behind. _Ahh, I was wrong; you're far from a fuzzy rabbit, you're a tiger. _

Teasing fingers slid across Grimm's waistline towards the palms firmly holding his ass. Eyes burning with desire impelled Grimmjow to do something he never did - he let Berry take control.

* * *

Throbbing pain was nothing in comparison to the passion that ran through his veins; it didn't matter anymore if he's gay or not, it was the craving not known until this very moment, and when strong hands loosened their grip leaving him free, that was the point Berry realized. _He really wants me; right now he's mine, just mine._ ...and an unknown tightness that had nothing to do with Grimmjow's cock ravaging his insides had started forming somewhere deep inside.

Not understanding his own mixed feelings he held on to the only thought he knew how to convey. _I don't want you to forget me. _

He shifted, slowly and observing the bluenette's reaction, then he gradually increased the pace; Grimmjow threw his head back, exposing the soft skin of his neck while Berry's mouth descended on it, nibbling sensually.

Fortunately for the latter, the blue-haired devil wasn't the one to lay down passively; he seized Berry's manhood, stroking it intensely and completely in synch with the movements of Berry's hips. _Ahh... don't... stop..._ Flashes of pure passion blinded him to the point where the only thing he could concetrate on were the deep thrusts and rough hand.

The pace quickened; the only sound he heard being the beating of his own heart resonating in his ears as the pressure muffled even the devil's moans... but still couldn't overpower the faint whisper calling out his name.

"_Berry._.."

_Yes, it's me... This is me, real me! _Pushing harder and harder he was dragging himself further away into the haze of pure ecstasy - until he reached the end, the rough hand and harsh movements wrapping him in the sweet embrace of oblivion.

* * *

Badly timed laughter from the next coupe had broken the haze, returning the entangled bodies into reality.

Not completely sure why, Grimmjow felt the need to apologize when he saw the whitish stains of semen dripping down Berry's thighs after he dismounted him. "Sorry." Unfamiliar word left a bitter taste.. _Why the hell am I apologizing?! _And he had to twist them. "It's basically your fault."

"So, you're saying I was _that_ good?"

Smirky smile almost bordering to a grin caught Grimmjow of guard. _Who are you and what have you done with a 'nice' guy?!_ "You made quite a mess yourself." He dragged his index finger alongside his abdomen that was covered in Berry's cum.

As if only now had the consequences of his actions hit Berry, he started picking up his jeans covering his groin while frantically searching his bag to hide the violent blush overflowing his face. _Theeeeere's the strawberry I know. _

While Berry pulled out a handtowel and started cleaning himself, all along still hiding behind his pants, Grimmjow took off his shirt and used it to wipe away the sticky fluid.

In an awkward silence Berry dressed himself and left the coupe to search for a toilet. Not a minute passed when four unknown faces showed at the door Berry had left half opened.

"Hi, mind if we sit here?" They were the same girls who were dragged away by their teacher an hour ago.

_Berry will have a break down. _As if his mind would want to take revenge for letting a stranger break his defense Grimmjow gave them a flirty smile, zipped the jacket and pointed at the seat. "Be my guest."

A busty blonde boldly took the seat next to the bluenet while the other three occupied the ones on the opposite side. _If you girls only knew..._

As expected, Berry wasn't thrilled over the company but kept the 'nothing-happened' mask in place; in fact, his act was so good that Grimmjow began to wonder which was actually Berry's true face.

* * *

The dawn had finally risen and with it they arrived at the Karakura town's station. _About fucking time. _

Morning air, cold and filled with noises of rushing feet when everybody hurried following their own paths was like a stinging reminder for Grimmjow. _I'm back... _

Looking back at Berry who still tried to find a perfect balance among holding the cat's cage, the sportsbag and avoiding Grimmjow's eyes, he slowly, as if sleepwalking, approached him and gently held up Berry's chin. Gently brushing his thumb across the warm and blushing cheek he whispered: "I wish I could say _'see you'_." Turning around, he left Berry to stare at his back while he waved down for a taxi.

* * *

**EPILOG**

"Nii-chan!" Blinded by a bush of cyan locks as his sister threw herself at him, hugging him like there is no tomorrow, Grimmjow barely managed not to fall over. "Missed you so much!" And when she finally let him go, she punched him in the shoulder like when they were kids. "If it weren't for your blue mane I probably wouldn't even recognize you anymore."

"Nice to see you too, sis." She was still the same cheerful child even as a grown woman; the only thing that was ruining her perfect image was a thin scar tracing over her forehead almost all the way to the tip of her nose. _An everlasting reminder of my failure as a brother. My only job was to protect her and I couldn't even do that. _To swallow the guilt that was starting to form in his throat he pulled her closer, hugging her even tighter. "I missed you." _So much._

"Wow, you _did_ get soft past this years; usually you sound so distant over the phone." She giggled and gave him a smooch. "I like this new side of you, I missed my old brother." As if remembering something she broke free from the embrace. "Come inside, you must meet my husband since you were _too busy _to attend our wedding."

Their parents were already there; his mom took just enough time to give him a quick hug and a lecture that he should come see them more often before she rushed back barking orders to the flower-delivery guy.

"Mom, would you stop making such a fuss? I just wanted a small dinner, not all this commotion."

"Shush baby, do this for me." Her kind smile allowed no arguing and leaving them alone in the room that was actually a smaller lobby she hurried to supervise the coordination of the staff.

Nelliel whispered to Grimmjow. "She feels guilty for ditching early on my wedding because she had to catch the plane for America. And now she's smothering me with the replay of _the happiest day of my life._"

Grimmjow smiled; their parents had always tried to repay them for their absence even when they were younger. _It's kinda nostalgic seeing nothing has changed... not even the averting eyecontact... _

Turning towards their father's cabinet Nelliel called out: "Dad, would you stop nagging him about martial arts, your son's here!"

"Martial arts?"

"Didn't I tell you? My darling is third best in the country."

Grimmjow whistled, genuinely impressed. "You found yourself quite a catch." Putting his arms around her slender shoulders, he whispered and winked, both knowing that he's going to tease her about it. "Must be careful that I don't steal him away from you."

"Joke's on you." She stepped on her toes, gently pulled his ear and whispered back. "He's not your type - he's too nice."

As if waiting for that cue, a man walked backwards out of a cabinet still talking to their father who stayed in... and then time stopped.

_Can't be. No. This is just a sick joke; a universe is playing with me! It's a coincidence, right... orange is the new black... right... _Everything moved in slow motion when the orange-head turned around and his brown eyes widened in recognition. _Shit!_

"Ichi." Leaving Grimmjow's side she grabbed hold of _Berry's_ arm, leaning her head on his shoulder. "Meet my lovely brother Grimmjow; Grimm, my husband Ichigo." She kept talking but her voice no longer reached Grimmjow's ears. The only sound left was the sound of a ticking clock which echoed in never-ending silence, leaving Grimm with only one thought – _Shit! ... Shit! ... Shit! ... Shit, shit, shit!_

The spell was broken by a soft touch around his ankles; looking down he noticed familiar white fur. _Blue-eyed white persian. ... He got it for her... _Shock paralyzed every muscle in his body.

"There you are." Nelliel chuckled picking up the cat. "Can you believe it, Ichi went all the way to Nakaguri just to get me the exact kitty I have always wanted." She didn't notice the awkward silence and the distance they kept between eachother; oblivious, she stroked the cat under it's chin in the same way Grimm did just couple of hours ago. "I know it's a _she_ but her eyes remind me so much of yours, nii-chan, and so I named her Grimm. That way I can always have a piece of you near me."

Grimm almost choked. _Please... stop talking!_

The first to compose himself was Ichigo; though still clearly uncomfortable he put his hand around Nelliel's waist... _Don't you DARE touching her! _...but after seeing Grimm's killer look he rather took the cat out of her hands. "I'm sure your brother is tired. Why don't you show..."

"You don't know nii-chan, yet." She ruffled the cat's fur and gave a quick kiss to Ichigo. "He never gets tired."

_Don't! _Still standing motionless, his mind in a complete mayhem, a painful question started to break through. _I have to tell her... Tell her what?! That I screwed her husband or that he cheated on her?! Like it matters – she'll be hurt either way! _Anger emerged overflowing the shock. _This was the reason I left! I stayed away to not be able to hurt her again and... Shit!_

Small pieces of arguing between Nelliel and Ichigo were overcoming his screaming guilt.

"But I wanna tell him!"

_How could I?! I had no fucking idea, that's how... _

"Not now, Nel. Please. Wait. Just... a little longer." Ichigo's voice was pleading like that of a man on a death row.

_If I had come to the wedding this wouldn't have happened. Fuck! _

"But... We haven't seen eachother for three years, I wanna tell him all!" Her scar became even more visible when she pouted.

_I shouldn't have come. I'm the reason of her pain; either I'm here or not I find a way to destroy everything._

"I don't care!"

"Nel! Please listen."

_Would you hate me, we could all live separated... in peace... Why couldn't you hate me?!_

"I can't wait any longer. He's my brother and he has the right to know; everybody else knows."

A sinking feeling slowly crawled over Grimmjow, erasing everything; every smile, every hug, every kiss; leaving only disgust. _Why don't you hate me?!_

Turning towards her brother... _She's so innocent... and I keep causing her pain. _...she opened her mouth and uttered the words that pushed Grimmjow over the edge. "I'm pregnant."

* * *

*** 300 km = 186,4 miles**


End file.
